Most families never finish a pre-plan because it feels like a project without edges. This checklist gives it edges. Work through it once and you're 80% done.
Step 1 — Personal information
- Full legal name (including maiden name)
- Date and place of birth
- Social Security number (kept in a secure location)
- Marital status and spouse's full name
- Parents' full names (mother's maiden name)
- Education and military service history
Step 2 — Disposition preferences
- Burial, cremation, or green/natural burial
- Preferred cemetery, columbarium, or scattering location
- Casket or urn preferences (material, style, price range)
- Headstone or marker inscription
- Open, closed, or no viewing
Step 3 — Ceremony preferences
- Religious tradition (or explicitly none)
- Preferred officiant or clergy
- Location (funeral home, church, outdoor, home)
- Music selections (three songs is a good baseline)
- Readings, poems, or scripture passages
- Speakers you'd like invited to give a eulogy
- Charities for memorial donations in lieu of flowers
Step 4 — Notifications
- Immediate family contact list (with phone numbers)
- Extended contacts (employer, close friends, community groups)
- Obituary — pre-write your own or leave notes on what to include
- Social media accounts and who has access to close them
Step 5 — Documents to gather
- Will and any codicils
- Trust documents
- Life insurance policies (each policy with company and number)
- Pre-need funeral contract (if any)
- Cemetery deed or plot ownership
- DD-214 for veterans
- Health care directive and power of attorney
- Recent tax returns and pension information
Step 6 — Funding
- Pre-need insurance policy (locks in today's prices)
- Payable-on-death account earmarked for funeral costs
- Existing life insurance sufficient to cover $10k–$15k
- Family agreement on who fronts costs and gets reimbursed
Step 7 — The conversation
A plan no one knows about is not a plan. Once the document is complete, hold one 20-minute family conversation to walk through it. It's easier than you think — the hard work is already done.